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BB is working....

November 24th, 2009 at 01:32 pm

BB got a job! Let me say, this BB getting a job thing has been such a source of tension between us.

BB has been back from his summer job for almost 3 months and he has been a lost puppy. He retired from playing ball, and now it was time to find a full time job.

BB has zero office skills, no degree, and very little ability to market himself to the type of job he wants.

BB's initial plan was to get a scouting or coaching job when he retired from ball. In a worst case scenario if he could not get one of those jobs- he would provide baseball lessons to float him until next summer comes and he can go back to TX for another summer and do the same thing he did this year.

Well, turns out BB's contacts that he was sure would find him a scouting or coaching job have less ability to get him a job than he thought. BB spent over 2 months waiting for 1 job to open up that he felt he had a very good shot at landing. That spot still has not opened up.

BB wants to provide lessons here- but this is a new town for him and he does not have the established client base he had in Florida. BB thought he would easily get students through word of mouth but it has not worked so far. I have suggested several marketing options for BB but he is open to them till it is time to actually do the work (going to schools, talking to coaches, flyers on cars) and then suddenly he does not think the idea will work. It would be a waste of time. I could do the work myself- but really I am just too tired from working all day to do his share of work as well- and too fight him/drag him along as I travel from location to location doing the work he should be doing while I am at work.

BB applied to a few part time jobs to make up for the lack of lessons but it didnt quite work out. He thought one place was going to hire him so he refused to go on any other interviews- then they didnt hire him- then he had a trial day at a GREAT part time job but got sick with the flu and never went in...

I feel like at every turn- BB was a big fat disapointment to me. This was his turn to show me that all the years of baseball playing were going to pay off. This was his turn to bring in something so I was not paying all the bills anymore. This was his time to do something to pull his weight. But over and over he had an excuse for not trying, he had a plan...but all I saw was a hell of alot of video gaming every day.

During this time I had 2 severe breakdowns regarding all this. I just wondered if this was a sign of our future. If years from now everything would be the same- if he was really just lazy.

We fought alot. I felt he was being very very picky about what jobs he wanted to apply too. There was a baseball college coaching job available 4 hrs away paying about what I get paid and BB refused to even apply for the job. He said it was too far away (This coming from someone who moves across the country every summer). I think in reality he was really just afraid to apply to the job. He didnt think he would get it. Trying to get a local college coaching job has opened his eyes to how competitive and difficult it can be. I just wanted him to get his foot in the door somewhere. If he gets a coaching job far away...we'll make it work for a year and then reevaluate the options. BB refuses to consider this. He has narrowed down his options to the 2 local colleges as places he is willing to coach at. And neither of them even have any openings! So theres been some fighting. We both feel defeated.

But the good news came this morning that BB was hired to work part time at a local sporting goods retail shop. BB will work 20 hrs a week, he can continue to take his college courses online, continue to work with his 1 baseball student- and I guess he is going back to TX next summer to coach there.

So its not great news- it's not a career and it's not a long term job- but its a step in the right direction and it's going to help relieve the burden of me paying the bills/supporting him every month from my salary.

Doing the numbers he will earn enough from his baseball student and work to pay 1/2 the bills, put $150 a month into savings/save $200 month towards getting our windows fixed/and have $600 a month to spend on gas, food, whatever.

I am secretly hoping that this retail job might teach BB that he does not want to work for minimum wage very long- and maybe it will motivate him to start applying to those coaching jobs in other states- rather than waiting for a local spot to open up- or for his 1 MLB contact to find him a job.

8 Responses to “BB is working....”

  1. Ima saver Says:

    I am glad he found something to do to help you out for a while.

  2. whitestripe Says:

    I'm sorry to hear there has been tension between you. While it should be an insignificant part in a loving relationship, it sucks that money is *always*, at some point, a topic of an argument. I feel like I am the BB of our relationship Big Grin I was frozen and unable to make a decision because of a lot of factors. It's not so much that I was lazy (it was one factor...) but a lot of it had to do with feeling like I would fail, that people would think I was not good enough or that I have no idea what I am doing, and that I really just couldn't find passion for the choices available to me.
    I hope you are right and that this part-time job makes him realise he can do bigger and better things. It's really about trying to build his confidence and supporting him, even though it's probably frustrating and annoying when he flails his arms around and whines that he can't (oh wait... that's me...) Big Grin

  3. LuxLiving Says:

    Perhaps he'll make some more contacts for lesson-giving at his new job!

    Glad that something came thru!

  4. LuxLiving Says:

    Does he have a business card that he can carry & give out that describes his private coaching?

  5. homebody Says:


  6. Analise Says:

    That's great that BB got a job, even if it's part-time and minimum wage. At least it's a start and it will help you. You have been exceedingly patient. If it were me, it would get old very fast if I had to carry more than 50% of the financial responsibilities as long as you have.

  7. Broken Arrow Says:

    That sort of thing would certainly cause tension in a marriage. Hopefully, this is the beginning of a great new chapter in both of your lives.

  8. frugaltexan Says:

    I'm glad to hear BB found a job. Although I'm sorry you have been having so much tension. I hope things get better now.

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