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Archive for August, 2008

Book reviews...and a moment of clarity

August 24th, 2008 at 10:30 pm

While living in Texas and living with little internet (yup- out by the pool again), I have taken up some financial readings.

First- I committed the cardinal rule for people trying to save/keep their money. I bought two books-brand new-from a bookstore. Had I been in FL, I would have gone through ebay, I swear! But right now I cannot rely on the mail system to keep up with me.

I bought one book by a man, I forget his name (some random finance man)called "Money and the People You Love"- good title, same old, same old information. I THOUGHT it would be about issues I struggle with now with my fiance. Issues like: getting on the same financial page, making saving money a priority for both of us, not letting ourselves get caught up in spending because we are 'together' and feel we want to spend money for 'quality time together.'...but no. The book with the great title was about mutual funds, annuities, 401K's and just basic explanitory stuff. The author said he named the book "Money and the People You Love" because a majority of people want money so they can take care of the people they love. Hmmph. I feel cheated. I read the book anyways. I'll sell it on ebay when I'm back in FL.

The second book I bought was "The Millionaire Women Next Door"..I thought it was by the woman who has a great "Millionaire Woman" blog out there that I have read a few times. I dont know-I thought she kind of owned the term 'Millionaire Women" or something. Silly me..Had I looked at the cover I would have seen it was written by a MAN! Some Stanley Ph.D who also wrote another millionaire book. Well...this book reads a bit like one of my grad school studies.

It's a study of Women who are millionaires and the author attempts to extract common threads among the women- not so the reader can become a millionaire- more so that the reader understands millionaire women. I read that too. I didnt really like it. It's a bit one sided to me. The author profiles only women who became millionaires on their own, no help from anyone, and only talks of their virtues. Kind of subtly exhaults the women.Since this is supposed to be an objective study using percents, averages, and high tech formulas, I didnt like how ethnographic it got in the middle of the book.

One tidbit I pulled from the book, a bit of an "Aha!" moment was stating that a big indicator of future millionaires is living on one income in a two income partnership. I.E.Living 50% below your means. Kind of "Duh!" but it worked for me. Rather than trying to save 10% of Baseball boys salary, and I save part of mine..and we both actively deduct the amounts each paycheck...I think it might be better to just bank the paycheck that is smaller.

I brought it up to Baseball boy today and he is fine with the idea. (But then- he is fine with "ideas"- its when it cuts into his fast food and video games that my ideas suddenly become problematic.)

P.S.- one reason I *think* this might be possible for us is because Baseball boy currently makes so little money. He netted a little over $10,000 last year- so for readers who are not familiar with my ongoing chronicle of life- we are not currently living off several thousands of dollars a month that will be drastically cut down. Once I get a full time job- I think I should AT LEAST be earning the same amount he does.

Of course, saving one paycheck is a bit off in the future...I need to get a job first. We need to clear the hurdle of this massive wedding first. We need to track our spending so we can "see" how much money we need- and if this will work. But I am thinking it might be a good thing to get off the ground before we get a mortgage. The first year of homeownership will likely mess up this plan-alot- so if we can get into a routine first, we might get a lesser standard of living going.

Or I am thinking I might have to wait till AFTER our first year of home ownership. So we are not creating goals we can not remotely reach.

So I have listed it as a long term goal so I do not put to much pressure on us. Merch was wanting me to get some long term goals going...and I like this one. Alot. I can't implement it now- at all- but I think if I have it in the back of both our minds as a long term goal...we can reach it within a few years. I think I am lucky I am trying to get a sucessful money lifestyle going now- before the mortgage and kids- because with either of those two loads on my back- I dont see how this would be possible (going from 2 incomes to 1). But without those two biggies- Baseball boy and I can plan to accomodate the 1 income and buy a house accordingly and plan kids accordingly. I hope.

Thats my piece. One other thing. I dont really want to be a millionaire. I mean- I wouldnt mind it. But it's not one of my lifetime goals -to die a millionaire. I really just want a lifestyle that is more 'fun' than 'work' and think that developing sucessful habits with money will get me there eventually. I just thought it interesting because this "Millionaire" author kind of wrote like being a millionaire is an ultimate achievement- rather than a piece of the process for living a great life.

He defensively states that the millionaire women live greatly satisfied lives (to the attack that they work all the time)-but not that they live great lives and are also millionaires. See what I'm saying? Anyways..I could be picking on this poor author because I am jealous of these women profiled. One symptom of jealousy is rejecting the item/person you are jealous of.

Also- one last piece before I sign off- The author admiringly states that none of the women have ever paid more than 300,000 for a house (he was explaining their frugal lifestyles)- but all women he profiled were close to 50 yrs old or older (much older). Now, I think thats alot misleading considering the price of real estate has drastically increased in the last 10-15 years-(Doubled? More?)and this author is implying that it is excessive to purchase a home for more than 300k. He implys- "Hey..if the maximum amount spent on a house is 300k is good enough for our millionaire should be enough for you-dear reader who does not come close to the wealthy status of these smart people."

Gamecock's not-so-quick-check in

August 23rd, 2008 at 01:07 am

Hey guys,
I'm not back-back, but I stopped in for an hour or so to read some blogs and write some sad news. (It's not terribly sad, just some regression for me.)
First, I read some of ya'll latest entries and I feel I have missed so much! I am looking forward to having internet again.
Second...ugh. I dont like saying it. I dont like it. But I have been thinking about it the last 2 days...(I even wrote a hypothetical 'dear Suze' letter-just to step back from the situation and try to see it from amore logical perspective.)...I think I am taking money out of the house savings fund to pay off the danm credit card. It jumps from 0% to 20% in a few days, it's at $2400 right now...and since the summers over I wont be able to make huge payments on it anymore. I starter out in late June with a $5600 balance, and now its at $2400. That's $3200 I was able to chip away at in 2 months...I guess a good consolation victory there.
House fund is at almost $38,000...I will bring it to about $36,000- still a good chunk of change- but it feels like a major blow. I tried to calculate a debt repayment plan to myself, but to get that 2400 back, I need to pay myself $200 amonth FOR A YEAR. $200 a month is doable...for a freakin year??!! Seems like forever just to get back to where I am right now. Sigh. But I made the bad...time to lay in it. And once I have paid off the card IN FULL NEXT's going in the freezer.
You know...I think I'm upset because I feel I am taking the easy route. Just taking $$ from savings to pay the debt. Then its gone and there is little consequence/little lost. It seems a cheap victory. I wanted to pay it down through patience, discipline and taste the satisfaction of making the final payment. But I ran out of time. I bought 2 pairs of jeans that I shouldnt have. I ate out to much. And I know better than to pay 20% intrest.
And just a quick note...still tracking expenses...we spend a hella lot more money than I thought we did...this has been the best financial excercise ever! I'll show the ugly rundown when I have steady internet again. I am worried about being able to track expenses come September because Baseball boy and I will be back in FL and we wont see each other nearly as much as we do now. He's not on board with the tracking expenses- I think he thinks I will yell at him or give him a guilt trip over every purchase- so I have been tracking his expenses because we share a car and therefore when he buys, I am right there with him. Thats it, I'm off now to read more of your blogs. The apartment complex pool has internet connection, so I'm out here enjoying the evening for a few hours.

I'm in Texas!

August 17th, 2008 at 09:13 pm

Just wanted to give a shout out that I am alive and ell in the lonestar state!
I drove to NE to pick up Baseball boy and he drove through the night to get to TX. We got here around 10am.
We have been stayoing in a hotel with no internet service, then moved into an apartment yesterday. To save $$ we opted to only turn on electric and forgo cable and internet.
I'm at Starbucks now, and gotta run...I'm not sure when I will be back to the blogs, but things here are going well.
Baseball boy has been a superstar on this team, they are going to the playoffs, and hopefully soon I can start exploring.
I have been tracking our spending...but it's not pretty. I will catch up with ya'll later!

I'm moving to Texas!

August 12th, 2008 at 05:09 pm

I'm moving to Texas! Baseball boy was traded this morning. He's on a road trip in Nebraska right now, so I gotta pack and move by myself.
He flys to TX in the morning, I am gonna leave in the morning, by car. No idea how long the drive from MN to TX is...but it should be BEAUTIFUL!

So- financially- this is a wash. His new team is in a playoff run, which means extended weeks of pay for him, and possible cash if they win the series- but me driving from MN to TX will be a couple hundred dollars that is not reimbursed since the team is paying to fly him.

But sometimes you cannot put a price on life experience, and this is one of those times. The drive will be stunning, and I have only been to Texas once. Now I get to LIVE THERE! Whoohooo!

Not a single thing to do with money

August 12th, 2008 at 12:15 am

Well first of all, I must say that I do love my new blog colors. I smile everytime I open up the page. Smile

Last nightís blog entry was kind of heavy. I was in a weird mood. Probably from watching too much TLC.

But last night got me thinking about other weird idiosyncrasies I have. I do plenty of odd uniteresting things, but one of my more annoying fears (for Baseball boy at any rate) is that after watching "Law and Order", the news, or a lot of "Lifetime" on TV, I become paranoid that Baseball boy is going to kill me.

LOL. I have learned to avoid those types of shows because it takes a good ten minutes for Baseball boy to reassure me that if he ever wants to leave me, he understands that he can just walk out the door, he does not need to plot my death. And even if there were large sums of money involved, all he does is have to tell me he was thinking of killing me for the money and I would just give it to him.

His obligatory "I love you, I'm not leaving you" falls on deaf ears. He does not understand I am not concerned about the LEAVING part; it's the KILLING that has me worried.

LOL. It sounds dramatic but I have heard that it is somewhat of a common fear. I blame Scott Peterson and all the drama he caused.

So, thatís it. I am still tracking my expenses and doing well.

hoarding items and the bigger issue

August 11th, 2008 at 02:41 am

I am watching TLC's "Help! I am a hoarder!" (Dont deny it- you have watched it too- at least wanted to watch it.) Now here is my little confession- this is the 2nd time I have watched it. I just find this lifestyle fascinating.

Now here comes my bigger confession- My mom was a hoarder of sorts and I am very afraid I will turn into one myself.

My mom was "diagnosed" with Bi-Polar about 3 years before she died. I quote the 'diagnosed' term because according to her therapist there is no way to really tell if you have the disease, they diagnose you if you display symptoms and respond to treatment. My mom never really responded to drug treatment, she just yo-yoed all around on different drug cocktails. And the therapist who 'diagnosed' her happened to be a Bi-polar specialist.

But who knows? She could have legitimately been Bi-polar. And the diagnosis brought her peace of mind and freedom to continue her ways, so there it was.

I compare my 'Bi-polar' mother to the hoarder because my mother was the shopaholic type. I bet she would have been 'diagnosed' as a shopaholic or compulsive spender if she had seen a different specialist that day.

Anyways, the house was filled to the gills with 'stuff'. If it was old, she kept it. If it was broken, she kept it. If it was useless, she kept it. On top of that, she was shopping constantly. It would take many many paragraphs to really convey how 'hoardishly' serious the situation was. Just 'stuff' piled to the ceiling in every room. All of it with price tags still attached!

After she died I did educated guessing based on receipts, paperwork and bank statements. The last few years she was spending nearly a hundred thousand dollars a year. She still had about 1 or 2 yrs left before she would have cleared her retirement account bone dry- the scary thing was it was escalating! Like the last year she nearly DOUBLED her spending!)

During this time I had no idea the numbers was that high. I was convinced I would inherit debt, but we had the typical mother/daughter relationship where she treated me as a child, and I acted like a child. I threw up my hands long ago and let her spend, spend, spend. Because she loved it so much and it kept her out of my hair.

Now, I see little 'hoarding' tendencies maybe coming out in me. I have kept a lot of my toys from childhood. (I cannot picture a situation they would ever come out of the box again, but I refuse to let them go.) I got rid of more than half the stuff, but kept about 2600sqft worth of stuff that I refuse to consider getting rid of. (It's very high end stuff and I cannot recoup a reasonable amount of the money.) But really, there is zero chance I can afford 2600sqft of living space when house hunting. Baseball boy and I argue back and forth if the guest bedroom will be filled ceiling high with 'stuff' or if we should get a long term storage unit. In the interest in saving money I argue against the storage unit.

And I combat the fear that I will turn into my mother by routinely going through all drawers, paperwork, freezer, closets- everything- and regularly clear everything out to bare necessities.

Baseball boy is constantly annoyed I have tossed something he needs. But clutter makes me anxious. And clutter in drawers is the worst. I 'know' if a drawer is 'junky' and it irritates me so badly.

And the most ironic part of all is that if I do end up having a hoarding problem, or a bi-polar problem, or a whatever mental problem- there is no way to even know! Baseball boy has repeatedly assured me he will sit me down for 'the talk' if he ever thinks I am mentally 'not right.' He met my mom, saw the house. It's really overwhelming to an outsider. Neither of us wants to deal with that again. I was never terribly sympathetic towards my mom, and wouldnít it be karma for me to get the same tendencies as her.

So yeah. That's my little story. It's not at the fore of my brain regularly, but shows like this TLC special reminds me that my brain might be a time bomb waiting to go off and lead me down a very destructive path. Yeah. I have weird paranoias.

general life things

August 10th, 2008 at 01:27 pm

I'm changing my blog colors. There are just way to many pretty colors in the world to stick with pink and purple.

Other than that, not much to report. Baseball boy is gone for another week long road trip. He has not been performing well this season and I feel for him. For myself personally, I try to look at this as a positive thing. Since I plan to be working full time next season with little or no vacation days earned, I may not see him play at all next season. But since this season has been pretty poor on almost all levels; financially, performance, and making friends...I wont feel like I am missing much next year.

Our roommateís car was broken into two nights ago. They got his stereo and navigation equipment. I think it's the same guys who took my wheels. They leave the cars pretty pristine minus whatever they took. They know how to remove just what they want without damaging anything else.

I am still tracking the budget. Still afraid to look at the list though.

I recently contacted a new realtor about possibly buying our first home. The first realtor was great, the one time we saw him. But he was not very good at really working on his end, earning the commission. He responded to my e-mails in a day or two, but the answers were short one liners. He never sent me any listings as he promised he would, or inquired when I was coming back to visit the city. I only emailed him once after meeting him last month, requesting him to put me on his mailing list that would alert me to new properties hitting the market- but he never did...and he never responded to that, come to think of it.

This new guy seems pretty involved in real estate. He is a realtor who also invests in fixer uppers. He writes a weekly blog about the real estate market in the city. So *fingers crossed* maybe he will be the fountain of knowledge we really need right now.

Financially we are in a good position about buying. There are pros and cons to both buying and not buying. We can stay in FL and just save money for however long we need to- or we can buy if we find the right place in GA. Yeah~ I think I am sticking with Ga even after all your suggestions. So we plan to take our time and really learn all we can. I think my biggest nightmare would be to get in over my head housing-wise, and I trust my cautious nature to guide us into the right situation.

This new realtor gave me the standard response of "well, it might be hard to find what youíre looking for in your price range, but I will see what I can do." I am wondering if that is a pretty standard selling technique. This being my second realtor- I have little first hand experience- but I took that sentence as a method for instilling fear in me and either increasing my price range (not going to happen)or feeling grateful towards whatever he shows me and buying it pretty quickly. (Also not going to happen.) I am very sentimentally attached to this down payment money and refuse to trade it in for a possible buyerís remorse later. If I donít think the places in our price range are worth the money, then I will save and bump up to the new price range. But we will see. I have enough other things going on, like the wedding, moving, getting a FL job to keep me occupied and away from 'house buying' fever. Although I still have it a little bit. Thatís about it for now.

The Financial State of Our Union

August 8th, 2008 at 09:25 pm

Here it is a week into August, and I have been doing well tracking all the spending. I have not really looked at the list. I am kind of afraid to look at it. Already I can tell we spend a lot more than I previously thought we did.

Things with Baseball boy and I are going well. We are growing. I think it's important to remember that we are both evolving, so the outlook each of us has now is not going to be the outlook we have next year. Our priorities will be different, our spending habits will be different and our wallets will be different.

In the meantime life is going to throw up a good number of financial obstacles we will encounter and learn from. They will teach us about ourselves and each other, as well as give us tools to use in the future. I will use these oppertunities as a chance to try different things, while venting my frustrations and encountering setbacks. I am glad I have a community here who will cry with me and can offer guidance when I donít know what to do.

I am trying to be very self aware in my financial choices, and I believe Baseball boy is getting there too. He might not share my philosophies with money but I need to remember that I am really a baby in money management. He might not make all the right choices, but neither do I.

There are no cardinal rules in money management. If there were, then I would follow the existing guaranteed model for living wealthy and make baseball boy follow it as well. But since it seems financial success is a different path for everyone, I will continue to 'experiment' with money and blog about my success/failures.

Although Baseball boy and I donít share the same financial pages right now, we are both trying to get there. I believe he wants the same things I want, but his Ďawarenessí and enthusiasm to get from Ďhereí to Ďthereí is not a priority right now. I think that following all my plans, charts and websites exhausts him. He has left the finances to my domain for now, allowing me to try different things, and once I have a strategy that works he will enthusiastically get on board.

I wish he would take initiative himself; it frustrates me when he mismanages money or we donít share the same outlook, but that does not make his choices, his journey or his perspective bad. It just means that we are both on an individual journey and are actively trying to get to the same point by using different paths. If I felt that he is selfish, irresponsible, or that we donít want the same things in life, then I would have left him years ago. If I felt that I was beating a dead horse, that he will always be a dead weight for me to drag around, then I would not still be with him. But I do see improvement. I do see enthusiasm. I do see comprehension and effort. Sometimes I donít understand his logic, but it comes from a good place and I cannot assume that I am the only one in the relationship capable of seeing the big picture.

I believe in Suze Orman's philosophy that there is a lot of psychology behind money and how it gets used. This blog was started for me to understand my own psychology with money, and to develop a working relationship with it. I want to be active and aware with the money in my life, and become as educated as I can so I can make the money work the hardest it can for me. I want to understand tools for using and saving money while trusting the methods I use to employ those tools.

This might take a long time for me to understand my own psychological issues with money. It might take me a year or two to develop a reliable and trusted money model that works for me and my family.

In addition to chronicling my own journey, my goal is to bring Baseball boy into this level of financial awareness I have found. He has his own relationship with money, and his own money issues. Because I donít think he is deeply "in touch" with his finances, it is hard for me to learn his financial ways. I am an outsider watching him as he kind of reacts with his money, rather than consciously plans for his money. Since he is not "connected" to our money, either enthusiastically or educationally, it frustrates me to see how he chooses to use the money because I see no deep thinking or long term strategy for the money.

I look to forward sharing with Baseball boy everything I have learned. To awkening the same goals and desires I have; to understand money, its impacts, and to create a strategy that will maximize the money that enters our life.

But first I need to learn it. First I need to understand my own money "issues" before I can tackle and work on his.

So it looks like we will have some problems. We will waste and lose some money. Hopefully save and invest some money. I will be counting on others in this community to help me avoid the pitfalls of money mismanagement that surrounds all of us on a regular basis. I will be reading your blogs to increase my financial education and maintain my "financial awareness" so that Baseball boy and I do not become a statistic that you all read about and wonder "what were they thinking?"

Eventually we will get to where many of you are. We will have a tried and true system that we both understand and believe in. We will both be "plugged in" to our finances and together we will be planning a lovely picture of our future. I look forward to it, we will get there eventually. In the meantime I hope I dont lose to much money. Smile

Back from playing hookie

August 7th, 2008 at 03:16 pm

Well, I have missed 2 days of blogs. And trust me, I really did 'miss' them!
Baseball boy had some time off so we have been doing 'stuff' and I find I enjoy getting on this website when I have an hour or two alone to really read the blogs, comment and get into the 'saving mindset'.
Saving money does not come naturally or effortlessly. Checking my credit card statements, calculating intrest, and determining net worth are not things I naturally do while Baseball boy and I lay on the couch together.
I do that stuff with the help of you guys, and it puts my mind at ease enough to enjoy laying on the couch with baseball boy later.
But trust me, I have clicked on this website a few times in the last 2 days and saw all the deliciously juicy new blogs- but had to exit out of it because I knew I would get irritated at all the interruptions.
I have not even read all your comments to my last blog. I'm going to address it later this afternoon. Looking forward to it!

more money issues coming to light

August 5th, 2008 at 05:44 pm

I am still thinking about Baseball boyís money habits. You know what? I think I am being a tad unfair.
I KNOW what he gets paid. I am in charge of the bank account and so I KNOW how much money is in it. I KNOW that the FL bills are about $700 a month, and that the travel money provided by the team will come up short during the drive. And lastly, I KNOW that Baseball boy will not take out a pen/paper and run numbers to see where we are at, where we need to be.

Yet, did I plan for our return trip back to Florida? No. Did I mentally figure out how much money we need in reserve to get back on our feet in Florida? No.

I have been living in the present, living in "lets pay off this credit card bill, and lower the wedding expenses, and start looking at classifieds for Florida jobs" when that is all good, but I shouldnít be relying on Baseball boy to be able to cover all the upcoming expenses he promises to cover when I can see the bank account and can see its not going to work.

Sure, I can be frustrated that Baseball boy promised me $300 to go towards the wedding then took it back to pay for upcoming bills. I can be frustrated he talked me into an expensive tricked out phone that he really did not have the money to pay for, but, Hello! I have been tracking stuff and should have realized long ago that the season will end, and we better be able to cover the expenses.

I think that during this season I have not approved of a few of Baseball boys purchases, only about $200 altogether (not including the phones)and to retaliate I held him to his word that he would pay all expenses this season. I did some things frugally, like conserved gas, and skipped some meals, but I have still lived a pretty healthy version of my normal life.

Now, here at the end of the season I am getting frustrated that he is concerned about the money needed to get back to Florida and such, and I am annoyed he did not plan for it.

I think I am annoyed with both of us. I am annoyed because he mentally spends money before he has it. Telling me he will pay all of "our" expenses this season so I can focus on the wedding. Previously telling friends that he will pay for this or that before even finding out what the cost is.
So what do I do? I try to get him to change his ways by manipulation. (Though it was all subconscious-I swear!)
I donít like a few of his purchases but I hold my tongue to try and "show him how he needs to change his lifestyle" by not really altering mine and showing him he cannot afford what he thinks he can afford. Then I let him get in a bind just to get him to reach that financial level of concern, to try and get him to get active and take a role in finances. I want him to feel uncomfortable the way I feel uncomfortable when I look over our spending habits.

Ohhhh. I am an evil evil woman. Iset him up to fail. I didnít even realize I was doing all this till I started blogging just now. I donít like admitting my part in all this. It is easy to blame Baseball boy and only point out his faults. But I have financial faults too- and part of my reason for blogging was to discover those faults. I just found one. I am not proud.

And any of you saying "what the heck?" to yourselves; read my previous entry to catch up.

My boyfriends money habits are driving me crazy again

August 5th, 2008 at 02:28 pm

grrr...Baseball boy is taking his stimulus check away from me.
I am fine if he wants to keep it for himself- just donít promise to give it to me!

For months now he has told me it is mine for wedding planning every time it gets brought up. I was planning to put it toward credit card debt so I would have money to spend on the wedding!

Then it arrives yesterday in the mail and suddenly he says, "well, we can use it to pay the FL lawn service for this month, and I will keep the rest for savings."
Me: "I thought you were giving that to me for the wedding?"
Him: "I canít. The season ends in 3 weeks and I want to return home with $7-800 to use as a cushion in case I donít get a lot of work when we get back."

I am all for him having a cushion of cash. It is after all, his money. But this is a trend I have started noticing emerging this season. This promising me money that never materializes. often did this happen?

*Before the season started, he told me I donít need to work; he will pay for everything to let me just work on my credit card debt. What happened? The 1st week of the season we suddenly learn we need to pay for an apartment and Baseball boy does not have enough cash to cover the 1st months rent, not last months rent. I'll be darned if I am paying both. So I make him withdraw 1st months rent from his signing bonus money. I pay last months rent. My $800 credit card payment goes to pay the rent. Never to be seen again.

*We move to Minnesota and once again, he will pay all the bills. Well, he must have forgotten the FL bills because when I add up the $300 in FL bills due, suddenly itís- "I canít cover all that." $150 credit card payment not going to the credit card.

*Our cell phone contract is up and we need new phones. Baseball boy wants the tricked out phone. I want that phone too but would rather get a free one. "I will buy it for you for your birthday" he says. So we each get the phone. $415.00 (plus $150 in rebates). Suddenly he is concerned about the price and it's lockdown on all future spending. If I had known I was going to have to either pay up for future wants, I would have just taken the free phone! $100 of credit card payments gone.

And now this- stimulus check gone Frown

I should have known. I am actually really annoyed at myself for all this trouble. In the past, Baseball boy has done this- promising financial things that never materialize. Just not to me!

You know when we were first engaged, and we started talking about the wedding, we were planning a resort island destination wedding- well he gets on the phone with his good friends from high school and starts spouting off: "We will pay for your flights. This is going to be awesome." I had to be like, "SHUTUP!" We had been DISCUSSING paying for everyoneís flights if we could get a group airline discount, and if we had the money- it would be a nice thing to do. But to actually tell people and get them all excited about it??

And when we were first talking about buying a house, we initially planned to get a large plot of land and have a guest house on it. We wanted Baseball boys best friend to live in the guest house because he has been through a lot and we want him around us- well Baseball boy gets on the phone with the friend, "...and we are going to have a guest house. You can live there for free. All you have to do is mow the yard." WHAT???!! We are both against making money off this friend, but I am not about to be struggling financially to pay for this friend!

I just get annoyed when Baseball boy THINKS he knows what something will cost, and then just assumes it DOES cost that amount, and starts actively planning for it to cost that amount.

I need to just get over the Stimulus check. I am over it. I am just not over his money logic. $7-800 is NOT GOING TO COVER HIM when we get back. It is going to be $400 in gas to get back to FL, plus $100 for 1 night in a hotel, plus we have FL bills waiting for us. He doesnt think this through. He makes money promises, or committments that he does not PLAN for!

Baseball boy has been living paycheck to paycheck for awhile now and since I no longer do, I am getting real tired of him doing it. It really costs us money living that way.


"Party girl- put the cup down!"

August 4th, 2008 at 07:33 pm

You have learned my secret. I am a recovering party girl. More like a party girl grown up. During my early/mid twenties, I lived by the rule that you are only young once; better get it out of your system now.

Now I am older and less interested in the partying, but my old ways still come out to party occasionally.

But today I think I crossed the border from party-girl slowdown, to party-girl gone. I turned down an invitation to go to a high school friends wedding. The wedding is across the country and in a month. The invitation kind of came out of left field as we only recently reconnected and its 5 weeks away.

But it was an opportunity to meet up with all my high school friends and just spend the whole weekend partying.
I went back and forth but ultimately said I canít go. I just have way too many cross country trips coming up in the next 6 months, plus my own wedding.

I thought "hey, it's only a $300 plane ticket then everything is free to me all weekend (my friends take good care of me). And it's a once in a lifetime event"(actually, I think divorce is in this couple's future but I doubt I would go/get invited to the next wedding.)

But considering I am not yet sure how I will pay for the events I have committed to, and my own wedding is going on a credit card for a few months...I can just see this as being a trip that tips the scales and leads me into credit card debt and way off my path to achieving all those goals listed on the left-hand side.

It's too bad, it would have been fun to have one last 'girls trip' before I got married. But I have had plenty of those.

Party time

August 3rd, 2008 at 03:52 pm is a money saving idea when throwing a party- Kegs! Who would have imagined they were so cheap compared to cans? The team bought a keg Friday morning and brought it out to the pool area of our apartment complex. Everyone chipped in $10 for as many drinks as the keg will hold. That damn keg was still over 1/2 full by nightime! So it got wheeled in again the next morning where we enjoyed it for another full day!
-no gas was spent after getting the keg
- no electricity was used except for a stereo
- and we all had some healthy fun outside in the sunshine, making up name games, and swimming for 2 days.

PS. unexpected price of a 2 day party:
-pedialite, fruit smoothies and gatorade for the girl who ended up throwing up- she will remain nameless but you all know her.
- chineese food because the greese and noodles is all her upset stomach will handle the next day
-extra shampoo spent getting vomit out of hair

Anyways, I have been bad not checking in with you all, I will catch up and read your blogs tomorrow!